Saturday, September 16, 2006

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May I Have Some Salt for This Wound, Please?

I am a temporary employee in my current job. I’ve never hidden the fact that I’d like to get hired on, even though there seems a remote chance it will happen in the next year. So it burned a tad bit when my group announced that one of the people had taken another position and they would be searching for a person to fill this role, but that I wouldn’t be able to apply because I am considered external, and they wanted to fill internally. However, they asked me to take a crash course in training so that I could fill the crucial aspects of this role until they found that new person.

I agreed, and for about the last month I’ve been performing the duties for this position. When they found a new person, the old person was supposed to come back and do the training. Now, I’ve been asked to train the new person because the old person can’t come back. There are two people that perform this job, and I will be training this new person on all the things I am comfortable, while the other person will be assisting with the things I am not comfortable doing.

Let me preface my rant by saying that I completely understand why I am not eligible for hire. That I get. But it just rubs me that I have been trained to do a job that I cannot keep, and now I am training the new person, too. I had a feeling that the cards would all fall this way, and look, I was right again. Oh, well, I’ll just tag something else to my resume and move on.

It would just be nice to have a secure job and benefits.

Bathroom Thought

Does choosing to work from the dark to the light say something about my personality?

Yesterday afternoon at work, I needed to use the restroom, as does any good citizen who over-consumes the coffee. As I open the door to restroom, the cleaning lady is in there cleaning the toilets. Trying to be nice, I ask her which ones she has already cleaned. She tells me it doesn’t matter. Now, this bathroom has one side of the 5 stall line that is significantly darker than the other side of the room. I just assumed that she started at the darker end and worked her way up to the light-filled end. So I chose the stall on the darker side just next to the one she was cleaning. Lo and behold, her next stop is the darkest stall.
For some odd reason, it hit me as an aspect of my personality that it says something about my assumption. For me to think that one should work from darker side to lighter side struck me as a need to work hard to get from the darker side (evil) to the lighter side (good). Where did this come from? I have no clue, but it was an interesting insight into my mind. Overanalyzing? Probably. But I thought what I thought and I thought I should share.

Life’s a Drag

I am so boring anymore. I don’t have time to keep on the latest news. I have a million and one things I need to doing, and no time to do them in. Let me just say that I have the utmost respect for all the single mom’s out there. That’s what I feel like most days. My husband is always at work or sleeping and I always am the one to take care of the baby. Not that I mind I her. She’s beyond amazing. Just some days, I would like some support. I don’t have anyone I can really talk to anymore. When I do see my husband, I desire to not blather on about my feelings. I don’t have any friends that I speak with regularly, and this is stuff I don’t feel comfortable sharing with my mom. Hell, most days I sit alone in my cubicle and eat lunch. Then I feel like having a pity party, and that makes me mad. I don’t wallow in self-pity. That’s not who I am. I think it’s because I feel alone. There’s never any time for me to do anything. A day in my life:

4:45 Alarm Starts Going Off
6:00 Must be out the door & on my way to drop the baby off
7:15 – 4:00 Work
5:00 Get to Mom’s to pick up the baby and find out about her day
6:00 Get home and start supper if it’s hubby’s day off
7:00 Get Baby ready for bed and give her a bottle
8:00 Baby may or may not be in bed – Might have time to do some stuff done.
10:00 Must be in bed to rinse & repeat

So, it’s no wonder that I feel alone & I hope that gets to change soon. However, cryptic that it may sound, I have a feeling it may get worse before it gets better.

Saturday, September 09, 2006

Weighing In On Weight Loss

If you look over at the links, you will see a new one entitled Weighing In On Weight Loss. It's mine and a daily log of my weight loss activities. Lately, I've been adding to it throughout the day in a Word file, and then pasting into the blog at night.

I'm hoping it helps. We'll see soon enough.


I’ve spent some time today typing up with outline and story material I have for my WIP. Working title is Queen of Legends, which I like a lot, and I want to make the story live up to the title. Last night in the AW chat, I had a bit of a revelation of how my story sounds something like the Bush Administration:

A was with no end in sight & an insane king. (Substitute insane with dumbass if it works better for you)

I don’t know if that sounds familiar to anyone else, but it fits for me.

My daughter is 7 months old, has two teeth, and is so close to crawling that it’s kind of annoying that she hasn’t yet. It’s amazing how much she’s grown, and how much her personality has blossomed. It blows me away. Her personality is awesome, and not to brag, but I think she’s going to be one cool kid. She, in every way, makes me want to do this again some day. In a couple years, of course.

I’m still job hunting. My contract position is not going to lead into a permanent position any time soon, and I need that permanent position. There are several jobs I going to work on applying for this weekend, and there is the annual CareerFest coming up in a couple weeks. I’ve been working on my resume, and I think I have a pretty good one right now. At least I hope. We’ll see. They do free resume critiques at the fest as well. By the end of the year, I would like to be in a permanent position.

Oh, and for whatever reason, I’ve been on a housecleaning binge this week. I stayed up until almost 1 am the other day doing laundry. Don’t know what bug bit me, but my house could use the help.

More to come.